The cute/creepy creatures made by JF Sebastian in Blade Runner greeted their creator with a cheerful “Home Again Home Again Jiggety Jig”, and that is what I used to tell my (ex-)dogs when I would return home from work for the day. “Home” has obviously taken on different meanings as I have gotten older, and is again this week at the forefront of my attention, as I am moving from what has been my shortest-lived independent living space into one of indeterminate duration that is approximately 8 blocks away. While I will miss aspects of this residence greatly, particularly the front porch from which I start and then heavily edit these vain blog posts, my economic situation simply cannot justify the expense of continuing to live here alone. A roommate would be a valid option to allow me to remain in this space, but at this stage of the game, I find myself unwilling to cede full control over the bathroom, stereo, TV, or peace and quiet, considering the excellent array of affordable living options available around Nashville.
I fell asleep exhausted on the sofa after a particularly dramatic day recently, then abruptly awoke and couldn’t readily get my bearings. This has happened so rarely that it has actually occurred to me that it’s never even happened on a camping trip or sleepover or a hotel situation, which would be when I would think it most expected. In this instance, my eyes were still closed, but I had the distinct feeling of not knowing where I was. If I were as inclined toward panic as I have been accused of by a select few who seem to know me less than all would imagine, that would have been an opportune time; however, I remember laughing out loud about what a weird thing the human mind is. As quickly as it came over me it was gone, and I realized I was likely waking from a quick dream. They say dreams are your brain’s way of sorting through the experiential mail, so to speak, deciding which memories to keep for further processing and which are of less significance. My shift in “home” over the past few years has given me a lot to think about during waking hours, I imagine it has my subconscious doing some heavy lifting as well.
The same day this happened, I read a horoscope advising me I’d benefit from opening the windows in as many ways as possible, which reminded me that my current place –while wonderful in many aspects– has lots of windows, but none of them open, having long ago been painted shut. Luckily, my new place has lots of windows, and all of the ones I’d open are willing to be opened. There are no screens, however; so in order to keep the squirrels, cicadas, starlings, and other critters out (it is an extremely wooded lot, with a very active squirrel nest within 15 feet of my door), the windows that are opened should be propped up with the framed screen inserts. [REMINDER: get more framed screen inserts so you can keep more windows open.] So this weekend I am moving to yet another place called Home, but I guess it is possible that the Rapture (and successive destruction of the planet) could change all of that. Either way, I have another new place to call Home for at least the next few months, and I’m going to keep the windows open while I move in.